Literatea

I’ve noticed that Google Ads are taking over the internet. In fact, Google is taking over the internet. It is an eerie cyber stalker trying to sell me things. Is Google the new door-to-door salesman?

On married life.

I love it. It’s a terribly exciting thing to do (be married) and a delight to have someone around (who I like an awful lot) consistently.

It’s fantastic when my mother-in-law rings up. We natter for ages about what-not and allsorts and at the end of it all I generally come away feeling calm and relaxed. What a marvellous thing to be able to say when so often mothers-in-law are maligned or worse, live up to their stereotype.

It’s fun. We went to see the Penguin (as in the publisher) 70 Years of Design exhibition at the V&A Museum for a date night. Saul Bass artwork! And if you’re thinking “s-a-a-d” then just remember: it’s a lot more interesting than one of our first dates where we sat in the library and looked things up on the web. Now that’s sad. Let us hope that we’re more balanced, centred people now. Pah!

Perhaps I should stop with the saccharine. Instead, read something useful like Martin-the-money-saving-expert-of Radio-2-fame’s site.

So. Job hunting. We all have to do it. We start ringing agencies. Then we encounter the tones of the friendly-but-firm receptionist (I’m sure it’s the same one. Perhaps there is a room in the middle of London where this poor girl sits all day, every day, fobbing off potential employees, nut bars, non-grads and desperadoes with a quick, well-practiced “what-you-have-to-do-is-send-your-cv-to-the-email-address-you-do-have-it-don’t-you-yes-thank-you-good-bye”).

What happens next is the inevitable descent into panic- the “what if I’m not good enough-what if no-one will ever employ me ever ever ever” thoughts. You know the ones. Then you decide that today you want to watch ten minutes or so of both informative and entertaining television, which usually is This Morning. What’s not to like? In the space of a few hours the subjects range from What To Wear At Your Next All You Can Eat Local Indian Buffet to Illuminated Breast Implants- Light Entertainment or Coruscating Calamity? With all this to look forward to I flicked the switch only to be confronted, alarmingly, by what could only be the Big Breakfast with rugs and a lightly ornamented mantelpiece. Where are Phillip and Fern? What has happened to Lorraine Kelly? I can’t begin to describe my alarm at their absence and can only wait and hope that their return is imminent along with the Autumn.